Part Three - Bingo – King
of the Bongos.
‘Okay, sit down you three twats from hell, shut up and I will tell you how I became King of the Pongos’
‘Pongos? I thought you were King of the Bongos,’ said Macho.
‘Okay, sit down you three twats from hell, shut up and I will tell you how I became King of the Pongos’
‘Pongos? I thought you were King of the Bongos,’ said Macho.
‘It’s a word doc mistake you idiot.’
Poncho chirps up – ‘Hasta La Vista baby – I am a terminator. Oooh my head hurts.’
Sounds of bouncing bodies doing intimate sex. Grunts and groans.
‘Macho and Mattress knock it on the head. You want to know about how I became King of the Bongos or rabbit to death instead? Besides, incest is against the law. You can get arrested.’
‘Leave them alone, besides, incest is really in since Game of Thrones.’ Tracy smiles as her siblings love each other.
‘My head hurts.’ Says Poncho.
Poncho chirps up – ‘Hasta La Vista baby – I am a terminator. Oooh my head hurts.’
Sounds of bouncing bodies doing intimate sex. Grunts and groans.
‘Macho and Mattress knock it on the head. You want to know about how I became King of the Bongos or rabbit to death instead? Besides, incest is against the law. You can get arrested.’
‘Leave them alone, besides, incest is really in since Game of Thrones.’ Tracy smiles as her siblings love each other.
‘My head hurts.’ Says Poncho.
Bingo, aka Anton, sighs and lets out a loud fart. Feeling
better he scratches at his hole and starts -
‘It was about 1965, and I lived in the jungle of the Congo with my parents as the last of the Moccasins.’
Mattress was wiping brotherly love from inner thighs, ‘Don’t you mean the last of the Mohicans?’
‘Get dressed you tart, no, the Mohicans are Indians and smell of curry. We were Moccasins and smelt of unwashed bodies when American backed guerrillas attacked our hut with rocket powered grenades and killed my parents.’
‘Cool, how did you survive?’ Macho smells at his fingers appreciatively.
‘My head hurts – I want to be a mother fucker.’ Poncho speaks up.
Tracy interrupts -‘Not tonight darling, you are not well. Take this aspirin, put it up your bum and you will feel better.’
‘Can I get on with the fucking story or shall I just disclaim the lot of you?’ Frustration makes Bingo pick up a crow bar and break San Pedro’s already dead legs.
‘I have a headache and my bum sizzles.’ Exclaims Poncho.
‘It was about 1965, and I lived in the jungle of the Congo with my parents as the last of the Moccasins.’
Mattress was wiping brotherly love from inner thighs, ‘Don’t you mean the last of the Mohicans?’
‘Get dressed you tart, no, the Mohicans are Indians and smell of curry. We were Moccasins and smelt of unwashed bodies when American backed guerrillas attacked our hut with rocket powered grenades and killed my parents.’
‘Cool, how did you survive?’ Macho smells at his fingers appreciatively.
‘My head hurts – I want to be a mother fucker.’ Poncho speaks up.
Tracy interrupts -‘Not tonight darling, you are not well. Take this aspirin, put it up your bum and you will feel better.’
‘Can I get on with the fucking story or shall I just disclaim the lot of you?’ Frustration makes Bingo pick up a crow bar and break San Pedro’s already dead legs.
‘I have a headache and my bum sizzles.’ Exclaims Poncho.
Tracy smiles, ‘it’s a dissolvable aspirin with vitamin
C. You will feel much better soon.’
Bingo continues, ignoring his rather dysfunctional family. ‘I was in the jungle, aged 5 and having a shit at the time of the attack. I just shrugged and wandered off until I met Tarzan.’
Bingo continues, ignoring his rather dysfunctional family. ‘I was in the jungle, aged 5 and having a shit at the time of the attack. I just shrugged and wandered off until I met Tarzan.’
‘My head hurts.’
‘Shut the fuck up Poncho. I don’t even have to write things like – Poncho said, because every reader knows it is you.’
Mattress, dressed in a drop dead gorgeous black leopard body suit, hand stitched from dead leopards, slightly steaming between the legs – ‘Tarzan. The real Tarzan of the apes? Wow, that is one sexy dude. Was he the King of the Bongo monkeys?’
Bingo scowls, ‘The Bongos are not monkeys, they have no tails, they are known as chimpanzees. Very clever and very dangerous. Just watch Planet of the Apes.’
To
be continued…‘Shut the fuck up Poncho. I don’t even have to write things like – Poncho said, because every reader knows it is you.’
Mattress, dressed in a drop dead gorgeous black leopard body suit, hand stitched from dead leopards, slightly steaming between the legs – ‘Tarzan. The real Tarzan of the apes? Wow, that is one sexy dude. Was he the King of the Bongo monkeys?’
Bingo scowls, ‘The Bongos are not monkeys, they have no tails, they are known as chimpanzees. Very clever and very dangerous. Just watch Planet of the Apes.’
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