Monday, January 05, 2026

4 Last of the Rhodesians: Chronicles of an African anarchist: The Gokwe Kid – Searching for Rhodesia 4

 

Journal 04.01.2026.

Sawa Camp, Nuweibaa, Sinai Peninsula, Egypt.

 

‘No one works hard here.’ Salama, CEO and owner of Sawa Camp to me on arrival.




Oooh. Angie dear sidled up late afternoon yesterday, just as a huge full moon eyed its beady eye on me from behind the mountains an hour away. Ah, how do I know it is merely an hour away to the other side of the expanse of the Gulf of Aqaba of the Red Sea? By boat? A plane? A flying boat? Swim it? Submarine? American aircraft carrier? Well, you never know hey. They seem to be popping up in all strange places recently.

Actuuuuallly, It is about 25clicks as the non-existence crows fly, but maybe the flies do, and as it is Saudi Arabia…they are an hour ahead of us…tra la la.

 

Anyway, Angie wants to know if I am planning any trips as she has been here before a few times. And has a few contacts. Turns out she paid only 50 euros for her taxi transfer. Mine was 70. Blah, blah blah, more paradoxes – ‘I thought I wouldn’t come here again because of the Egyptian guests always have loud music on…’

And

After I asked her to arrange a taxi to the supermarket since that might be easier than using her contact to take me into the desert either by a motorised vehicle (think of breakdown and die of thirst scenario) or…a…CAMEL! The only camel I want is a dead one carved up for biltong as I brought a mix with me.

‘I must check with Salama as I deleted all my contacts when I decided not to come again.’

She is well organised, but I sent her off with the quest and I will be going to the shop WITH Angie at 11.00am - she thus informed me this very morning after returning from a bit of the old Gyppo Guts, wot wot, arf arf, with nicely washed face and no teeth in, music playing…dah, da da dah… (Supertramp.)

 

 

Last of the Rhodesians: Chronicles of an African anarchist

The Gokwe Kid – Searching for Rhodesia 1980- 202?

 

That title is the one I am going to work with. There are zillions of thought processes that decided on that.

***

 

Well, that was a heavy shopping trip. At the check point we were asked if we happen to have a spare box of cigarettes and asked where I came from. Yet again I had to change nationality to the one on the front of my passport - Mud Island, and I am sure I will purchase you a carton of smokes to give to you on the way back. NOT.

I was half out my kipper and in 15 minutes we are in the centre of town. It was far better than I had thought. There was everything I had hoped and desired. The only thing missing were black people and Indian shop keepers and I was back where I belonged.

 


Load up on cola and few munchies stuff. But not before an agonising walk to an ATM. There are only two and one was ‘BROKIN.’ I am not sure if the kind gentleman telling us was referring to the fact it had been broken into, it was flat broke, or broken down.

 

A long painful schlepp down the drag and…tra, the fucking la - her card doesn’t work and can I lend her some lollies. Like two fucking grand! She promises to pay when we get back to camp.

 

Yeah whatever. We went into a very, rather chaotic, tiny pharmacy. The walking had kicked the ischia into pain mode, so I got some Ibuprofen and when her back was turned, whilst she was looking for herbal toothpaste, I went ‘Tss’, to the bloke. I made the internationally known dumb language for putting a pole in a hole, which I had a bad feeling that would be beyond the comprehension of the Geshupsta. But you never know - hey.

 

Back at home after paying Euro 5.50 to see death approaching, whilst overtaking at a restricted 90 at 120 over a solid white line.

 

As she takes her purchases, which I noticed had a bag with about twenty limes in it (Eeek – some strange voodoo  ritual,) ‘Would you prefer cash or a bank transfer?’

 

‘Cash please.’

 

She returns eventually and starts babbling a load of shite about having to change her account to Egypt or some uninteresting crap. I give her five euro change for two twenties.

 

I had a gorgeous fat dooby lit up and placed into the end of a swanky black and silver fag holder the type faggots use, in my lips and eyeing her because I knew something was going to happen between us -

 

Actually, she is about 5 foot 2, dark hazel eyes and constant ruddy cheaks which was exactly what I thought when she starts a ruddy cheek to moan about the music on. WHICH it is like, on very quiet…

‘You don’t wear earphones then?’

And as I deeply exhaled a cloud nine of curling, magic smoke, looked at her and spoke in a long drawl (I was feeling so laid back just as Blue Oyster Cult - Don’t fear the reaper played) …

‘Nooooooooooooooooo.’

 

She turns away, and mutters ‘It is a camp you know.’

 

That was my day trip. She babbled to the driver about eventually going to spend a night in the desert. I don’t think I will be invited…hah hah hah.



***

 

Enough of that nonsense. With a bit of peace and quite I concentrate on the Prologue. And the Terms and Conditions for the website. But….

 

‘Don’t cry for me, Rhodesia’, the journal is the constant LIVE memoir of the Gokwe Kid. If anything exciting should befall me, such as – no fucking idea! It is not my fault I am a magnet for all the lunatics that wander this godforsaken planet - including the one I see in a mirror.

I will let you know.

 

(I will paint my finger nails black after the posting. I did have them bright orange once, but idiots kept asking me if I worked for Easy Jet.)

No comments: