Journal 11.01.2026.
Sawa Camp, Nuweibaa, Sinai Peninsula, Egypt
I expect an
answer to my request to find me a shop from chatGPT later today. Although a
simple request, it, like human intelligence, are prone to not having a clue
about anything.
Whilst I
wait, I suddenly needed to, and wondered about it, and as such gave chatGPT
another easy question. The answer is ambiguous…
Question - What
is the present estimation of greenhouse gases given out by humans in the form
of burping and flatulence?
|
Source of Methane |
Approximate Global Scale |
|
Human burps
& flatulence |
~<1 million tonnes CH₄/year (very rough, not officially reported) |
NOT officially reported??? And why is that?
My present next-door neighbour in his shack, emits enormous amounts of methane
during the night and especially at sunrise. He is an old Frenchman and leaves soon
thank fuck, and he yowls for hours over a pray book, and I am downwind of his greenhouse
emissions of flammable methane (see Youtube scientific experiment,) which are
almost tuneful redemptions of Marche
funèbre, which, under the expertise of a sound mixer such as
Paul Oakenfold, would become a Club dance classic.
Whilst the
winds of change are again storming the headlines with the instability of global markets, escalating
geopolitical tensions, climate disaster, or the rise of uncontrollable
artificial intelligence, I must suffer the appalling stench he emits whilst waiting
for the wind to change and blow it away.
As activists around the world clamour for
a reduction in gases causing the planet to heat up to the point that within a
few years it will be possible to poach a couple of eggs at the North Pole simply
by pulling your pants down to have a wazz, one does ask if, just for example,
Gretzel Bumberg, realises that she and her attention-seeking hanger-ons are as
guilty as the rest of us.
She does! THAT is because she refuses to
fly as she knows that as the cabin is pressurised and depressurised the entire fuselage
becomes a miniature greenhouse of trapped flatulence of various odours.
Pilots do have, as required by law, a panic
button when the level of toxins reach above ‘flight sicknesses’ and releases
oxygen masks for himself and the co-pilot but no one else as they are
considered a waste of fresh air, and shareholders of the company would ask
serious questions related to unnecessary overhead expenditures.
I know this because as I explained in a
previous posting, the stinking old crone sitting in front of me in row 19 F,
dropped her guts three times with such a magnitude that I tried unsuccessfully
to get the overhead oxygen mask out its compartment, making me think there isn’t
one in there at all – just smuggled cocaine from Columbia. Come to think of it –
I would happily have a sniff of that.
And as such, since the success of my ground
breaking Defibrillator Kettle, this entrepreneurial Rhodesian has
come up with a Reversable Human Methane Prevention Kit.
Using materials and advise available
during my up bringing in Rhodesia, I have created such a kit out of 100%
organic stuff and includes the instructions of the usage there-of as given to
me by my peers, friends, and family members from that time (1964-1978) in
picture form. I sell them on Ebay for $200.00.
I personally have tried and tested this
kit as I love animals and wouldn’t dream of buying The Body Shop shares as that fad
is now a lost cause.
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