A short summery of a speech by Zimbabwe Presidential hopeful -

A short summery of a speech by Zimbabwe Presidential hopeful -

Magwana Me Bananaup Mehole

In a packed stadium of teenage, unemployed delinquents of mixed race,  40 year old, Magwana Me Bananaup Mehole, declared -

When I am the President of Zimbabwe I will -

1. Look at my watch and take the time.

2. Build a nucleoli arsenal to stop Arsenal fans invading our pitch.

3. Change the name of Zimbabwe into Rhodesia so we can forget our colonial past.

4. When I turn 33, I will have a big party and all invited and entrance fee will only be 33 dollars.

5. Send the first man to land on the sun at night time.

6. I will send a candidate to win the Eurovision song contest.

7. Create a train so fast – it will arrive back before it even started.

8. Eat enough sadza to keep me up all night in pain.

9. I will reduce tax on washing powder to a mere 100%

And finally,

10. I will tax the poor to keep the rich filthy.

Polls indicate that Magwana Me Bananaup Mehole is leading ahead of his only rival, unknown, but known as the tramp who sleeps alone on the street.