My $1.000,000 Donation To Africa

Just a quickie to fill in the time till my next important posting.

This has arrived in my Email box a few minutes ago and has moved me to tears. I will of course do the right thing and not claim my prize because as you can see, if unclaimed within a certain time the money goes to a worthy cause in Africa. Is that not so fantastic! I am crying with joy.

All those poor people starving to death in Zimbabwe because of people like me, will be benefited because I finally have a social conscious and ( one moment please, must open another tin of beer…glug glug – right where was I), and realise that YES, people like me , the neo-colonialist, the rampant Pan-African rapist, the off-spring of slavers, white war mongering capitalist, bigoted racialist, (where the fuck is that last tin of beer? I am sure I left it in the fridge overnight…damn), mmmm, what else, trained killer of innocent Black people (well, I think that’s a bit of poetic licence there, I wouldn’t exactly call myself well trained in that matter, although I never managed to shoot myself in the foot , even when pissed out my box), CAN change their ways and become model citizens of the world with humility and dignity (hey, the sun has just come out – I don’t believe it! After 2 and half months of pissing rain!), and, er, YES we can do something to ease suffering to those we have suffered on (is this making any sense?) and so I with utmost modesty give away 1 million dollars (fuck me, that’s a lot of beer-hey!) to those more wanton of it than me.

MOTTO: FIGHTING POVERTY ROUND THE WORLD

FROM THE DESK OF THE E-MAIL PROMOTIONS MANAGER,

INTERNATIONAL PROMOTIONS/PRIZE AWARD DEPARTMENT,

AND AWARD PRESENTATION CENTER, UNITED KINGDOM .

MICROSOFT CORPORATION WORD LOTTERY,

UNITED KINGDOM

61-70 Southamptom Row, Bloomsbury

London, United Kingdom WC1B 4AR

REFERENCE NO: MSW-L/200-26937

BATCH NO: 2005SEPT#22

WINNER NO: 5

ELECTRONIC MAIL AWARD WINNING NOTIFICATION.

DEAR WINNER,

MICROSOFT CORPORATION MANAGEMENT WORLDWIDE ARE PLEASED TO INFORM YOU THAT YOU ARE A WINNER OF OUR ANNUAL MS-WORD LOTTO LOTTERY CONDUCTED IN EUROPE BEING THE HOST OF THE EVENT FOR THIS PRESENT YEAR MEGA JACKPOT LOTTO WINNING PROGRAMS HELD ON 16th July, 2007.

YOUR PERSONAL E-MAIL OR YOUR COMPANY E-MAIL ADDRESS WAS ATTACHED TO MSWLL. WITH SERIAL NUMBER S/N-00168 DREW THE LUCKY NUMBERS 887-13-865-37-10-83, AND CONSEQUENTLY WON THE LOTTERY IN THE FIRST CATEGORY.YOU HAVE BEEN APPROVED FOR LUMP SUM OF $1,000,000.00 (ONE MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS) PAYABLE IN CASH CREDITED TO FILE WITH REFERENCE NO: MSW-L/200-26937. THIS IS FROM TOTAL PRIZE MONEY OF $25,000,000.00 USD, SHARED AMONG THE TWNETY FIVE (25) LUCKY INTERNATIONAL WINNERS IN FIRST AND SECOND CATEGOERY.

ALL PARTICIPANT WERE SELECTED FROM WORLD WIDE WEBSITES ESPECIALLY YAHOO MAIL THROUGH OUR MICROSOFT COMPUER BALLOT SYSTEM DRAWN FROM 21,000 NAMES,AND 3,000 NAMES FROM EACH CONTINENT(CANADA, ASIA, AUSTRALIA, UNITED STATES, EUROPE, MIDDLE EAST, AFRICA, AND OCEANIA, AS PART OF OUR INTERNATIONAÑ E-MAIL PROMOTIONS PROGRAM WHICH IS CONDUCTED ANNUALLY FOR OUR PROMONET MICROSOFT WORD USERS ALL OVER THE WOLRD AND TO ENCOURAGE THE USE OF INTERNATE AND COMPUTERS WORLDWIDE.

YOUR FUND (CERTIFIED CHEQUE) HAS BEEN INSURED WITH YOUR REF NO: MSW-L/200-26937 AND WILL BE READY FOR DELIVERY. IT WILL BE DELIVERED TO YOU BY ONE OF OUR CLAIM AGENT IN CHARGE OF YOUR ZONE (SR. CARL LOUIS ). YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESS SHOULD BE USED IN ALL CORRESPONDENCE WITH YOUR CLAIMS OFFICER, PLEASE NOTE THAT, YOU ARE TO CONTACT YOUR CLAIMS OFFICER VIA EMAIL AND PHONE AS WE ARE PROMOTING THE USE OF E-MAIL. ALSO YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO CALL HIM TO CONFIRM YOUR WINNINGS AND GOVERNMENT TAX PAYMENT THAT IS ALL, AS HE WILL PROVIDE YOU WITH THE NECESSARY DETAILS ON HOW TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE.

AS PART OF OUR SECURITY PROTOCOL YOU ARE TO QUOTE THIS SECURITY CODE MSW/FEB/XX06 TO YOUR CLAIMING AGENT. THIS IS TO PREVENT SCAM .

PRIZE CLAIM

MAXCON SEGUROS MADRID ESPAÑA S.A

PRIMERO DE MAYO 26 28008 MADRID ESPAÑA.

OFFICER CONTACT IS:

E-MAIL: maxconseguros@aim.com

TEL / FAX: + 34-911-849-810

CLAIMS AGENT,

SR. CARL LOUIS.

CLAIMS AGENT

REMEMBER, ALL PRIZE MONEY MUST BE CLAIMED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. ALL FUNDS NOT CLAIMED ON OR BEFORE THE FIXED DATE WILL BE RETURNED AS UNCLAIMED AND DONATED TO CHARITY ORGANIZATION IN AFRICA .

NOTE: IN ORDER TO AVOID MISTAKES, PLEASE REMEMBER TO QUOTE YOUR REFERENCE AND BATCH NUMBERS AND YOUR SECURITY CODE OF MSW/FEB/XX06 IN ALL CORRESPONDENCES WITH YOUR CLAIMS OFFICER. DO NOT REPLY ANY OTHER MAILS LIKE THIS ON NET, AS THEY ARE A LOT OF SCAM ARTIST OUT THERE PRETENDING TO BE US. YOU MAY SEE MAILS LIKE THIS DO NOT REPLY.

DO CONTACT YOUR CLAIMS OFFICER SR. CARL LOUIS via maxconseguros@aim.com AT ONCE YOU WILL BE ASKED TO PROVIDE SOME DETAILS TO ENABLE THE OFFICE PROCEED WITH YOUR WINNING CERTIFICATE AND FILE KEEPING.

CONGRATULATIONS, ONCE MORE FROM THE ENTIRE MANAGEMENT AND STAFF OF MICROSOFT CORPORATION TO ALL OUR LUCKY WINNERS THIS YEAR. THANK YOU FOR BEING PART OF THIS PROMOTIONAL LOTTERY PROGRAM. OUR SPECIAL THANKS AND GRATITUDE TO BILL GATES OF MICROSOFT AND ALL HIS ASSOCIATES FOR ALLEVIATING POVERTY AROUND THE WORLD.

SINCERELY,

BLAH BLAH BLAH, ETC ETC - You think the idiots would at least use a spell checker!