Saturday, September 07, 2013

Weird Feeling





I have just pushed the enter button, and off it went. It has taken over six years and now I have finally sent my last exam.

That is it – school is out for summer; school is out for ever. 12 modules I did (one I cancelled a third of the way through because it was a load of shite) and now… that is that!

That was one hell of a voyage of discovery. When I look back at all what I did –


    T211 Design and designing (2012)
    T183 Design and the Web (2011)
    TU120 Beyond Google: working with information online (2010)
    EA300 Children's literature (2009)
    A363 Advanced creative writing (2008)
    A103 An introduction to the humanities (2008)
    A176 Start writing plays (2007)
    A215 Creative writing (2007)
    A174 Start writing fiction (2006)
    Y160 Making sense of the arts (2006)

Completed qualifications

    Bachelor of Arts Open
    Diploma in Literature and Creative Writing (E25)
    Certificate in Humanities (C36)

It is like…wow, I did all that!

Some were a breeze and I just messed about, some were like drawing your own testiness out and eating them. Over half of them - I had a fall out with my tutor. I think I was given four official warnings from the OU to behave myself or get banned for ever.

Nothing new there. In the old days you either got caned or if that didn’t work – expelled.

The hardest ones were - An Introduction to the Humanities and Children’s Literature.

The former taught me about evolution, religion, history of art, art, Roman architecture, philosophy, music and how to quell a native uprising with the help of a Maxim machine gun.

The latter was unquestionably the hardest academic thing I have ever done. Remember, with Creative and Advanced Creative Writing, I simply let them teach me how to write The Gokwe Kid and Simply the Pest. But, The Humanities and Kid’s Lit needed serious stuff written.

The funny thing is, when I enrolled with Kid’s Lit, I hadn’t really read the guidelines. I thought all I had to do was write stories for kids. Er – wrong, very wrong. I had to read kid’s book and systematically analyse them and write pages of clever-clever stuff.  (Nine months of it (so was the former module). It almost broke me but – it took me to another plane. Ryan Air actually…lol.

What happened was that I was forced to stop arseing around and concentrate. I did and I learnt much. I was border line getting a Grade Two Pass. I needed it because at Level Three, with two Grade Two passes, I was 90% guaranteed that when I go on to Honours, I could walk out (well, cyber walk out) with a 2.1 Upper. The second highest behind a distinction.

And then, I did an amazing thing. It had never been done and I doubt it will ever be repeated. I knew I needed over 80% for an exam to get my desire and I went into that zone that frightens people.

I took the exam requirements and turned them around. I was warned by many people that I was doomed. But I had a hunch it would pay off. The exam was about comic books for children. I decided, at the ultimate risk, to actually answer – in comic form. I ran against two problems. One was it wouldn’t be accepted and secondly; I could incur the wrath of the publishers I was mimicking.

The result? I created over three weeks at 10 hours a day, a masterpiece.
It is, at great risk, ‘up there’. –


And so – I did it.

And now, I have my BA, but I wanted Honours. Why -? Because without what the OU taught me – you would have none of my books to read, none of my Photoshop jokes, in fact…nothing at all - besides some drunken rambling. (Has any thing changed?)

Till next time – very soon.

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