Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Philosophical Ponderings of a Pathetic Philatelist

Back in the ‘good old days’ when we Whites told the Blacks what to do and things worked rather well… for some obscure reason, nearly every White household had someone who enthusiastically collected Rhodesian First Day Covers.

I do not deny that the stamps tended to be very colourful, educational, and promoted us Whities as the next best thing since slaughtered Zulus, but sadly, the aspirations that in the future they would be worth a fortune - turned out to be rather delusional. Delusional - such as like our Great White Bwana Smith said – ‘We have the happiest Blecks in Africa.’

I still ask myself, if they were that happy, why did that Black kid at the Scout Rally in Ruwa Park in 1972, punch me in the eye when I told him it was forbidden to play on the assault course after dark because it was dangerous? And the little shit ran away before I could give him a contrasting white eye.

That is beside the point. Now, as a lightie, I collected stamps. Most boring kids do, especially the poor ones on a tight pocket money budget. My old man (pushing up daisies for a long time now), was a right shit. He would get all the First Day Covers (FDC), with the fancy Salisbury Central Post Office date franked on an illustrated envelope. Meanwhile, I was forced to go to Mount Pleasant Post Office and purchase the lowest range of stamps up to the maximum of 25 cents, less five for the plain white envelope, and put up with half a first day cover.

BUT – hah. Revenge is MINE. Mine I tell you. Because there are millions, trillions, zillions of the worthless Rhodesia FDC crap floating around, barely being sold for 50 pence a pop on EBay. Except…one – MINE!

Quite simply, I have a boring one depicting the Bulawayo Trade Fair of April 29-May 7 of 1978. Two stamps, 4 cents and 8 cents, on the ‘official’ envelope – franked and placed so professionally by the White Post Master himself! (He was a bit of a piss head and his wife had a right large arse, as I recall) but, and here is the big but…
Check out where it is rubber stamped. Yup…Gokwe. The end of the fucking world! Death Valley on a plateau!

It is the only one in existence, which I will swear on my father’s grave (easily done actually). AND, I am considering giving it to the highest bidder of my forthcoming bestseller for the signed 01 copy (of a maximum of 10), in the not too distant future…which leads me to…

When is the sodding book coming to frustrating fruition? Not long, I am sure you will have it in time for your deity orientated present sock over the proverbial mantelpiece. Actually, I am working away at the 3rd edit and a stunning new opening chapter which will be soon presented on this blog as a taster for more anarchy to come.

Meanwhile…the website is up and running, albeit still set for the Open University exam, but that will be changed in a couple of months…BUT, some laughs to be had here.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I too have a collection of Rhodesian FDCs faithfully sent to me by my Granny, mostly postmarked Gwelo, in the belief that 'one day they will be worth something'. Well still waiting for that day but in the meantime they are a colourful record of the small place where we grew up.