Sunday, April 29, 2018

Bums and Ants

When I was The Famous Gokwe Kid -

As usual I fucked up.

Deep in the bush, I called the peasants together and gave them a propaganda speech of the finest as to why whitie should control their lives.

Now – any orator must be above the audience. So as to have a body language of dominance.

With 400 peasants gathered, I climbed onto this ant hill. I began my speech. But was rudely interrupted by my translating constable -

‘Ah, PO Greenberg, they say it not a good idea to stand on this ant hill.’

Such superstitious nonsense. What they think? That their great ancestors will arrive from below and strike me on my behind and eat my freshly matured testicles. Hello. Time to stop this Mumbo-Jumbo.

‘It is time for you to accept – that- White man is here to stay and you will stay as slaves but get paid unless you just hang around doing fuck all but fuck nonstop, and become terrorist and get hung. This has to stop.’
Again I am interrupted-

Àh Sah – you are standing on a Matabele ant hill. Very dangerous.’

Such nonsense…

‘This is Mashonaland. Matabeles are not living here and… why are you peasants all laughing? Listen to me. Whiteman is supreme we can handle all pain.  And … what the fuck…ahhh. I am dying’

- - -

With hindsight …

Well. It was quite a clever idea. (Not.)

_ _ _

Serious consequences. It took three doctors to remove the ants from my scrotum and dig three hundred out of my bum.

I decided to leave the BSAP.

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